Who am I - Online?

Creating an online persona is stirring up insecurities I thought I had outgrown...40 years ago. Apparently not. What do I really look like? I search through my photos on this computer and just see an older, bald guy, average build, you know somewhere around 60 years old, blemishes, side leaning smile, the eyes that used to be lanterns now tailing into wrinkled edges.

Where are the photos of my six pack on the beach - the one without the slouch or handles- where is my brilliant smile - the one without the stained premolars?

I have the good fortune to live with my children much of the time. And in some ways it can be forgiving. Lily is all of 11-years old and can easily point out a 14 -year old from a 16-year old. But in her estimation, anyone over 25 is simply a grownup. That is the category I inhabit in blissful denial of my decay.

This online two dimensional reality is a reckoning. It feels as if the towel around my waist is about to fall. I thought I had matured to embracing ' inner beauty' and detaching from my 25 year old mortal frame. Apparently not. Am I the only one?